SMASHED SAINT

Category: humans are humorous

  • The Starry Sky

    photo credit: national geographic I guess you could say that China and I, and Cambodia and I, have history. Sorry, let me backtrack a bit–this April, I’ll be going to China & Cambodia with a team of four other really amazing, courageous, talented, and fierce women to conduct two schools of worship in Beijing & Phnom…

  • Fighting for Hamlet

    Recently I began tutoring Hamlet (obviously not his real name), an international student who is attending a Lutheran high school though he himself is, as he emphatically stated, “not Christian.” He further clarified that he disliked all the talk of God that was beaten into his head; he was tired of hearing, “You should believe…

  • The Evergreen Tree

    Oh Christmas tree oh Christmas tree… Christmas celebrations come replete with a cornucopia of customs, decor, carols, colors, bells, ribbons, and aromas. A much-loved fragrance and happy sight is the decorated Christmas tree lit up with twinkling stars and family memories passed down from grandmas to granddaughters in hanging ornaments. I recently saw an Instagram…

  • Spirit of Settiasos

    Who is Settiasos? First let me share with you what a conversation with Settiasos might sound like: Example 1 Anon: I don’t understand why So-and-So straight up just lied to my face about not returning my phone call. Settiasos: Mmm…it’s probably because So-and-So suffers from a Spirit of Unreciprocation and a Spirit of Lying. Anon:…

  • Emo Girlfriend Has/Needs a Cheerleader

    real events: not my best moment(s) i totally cursed a police officer a couple Sundays ago. he ticketed me for yielding too tardily at one of those ridiculous “left turn ok on yellow but yield when it’s flashing yellow” confusing traffic lights that just end up creating a big ol’ tangled web of “let’s try…

  • nudity, part deux

    It takes two to tango. We’ve heard this before, and it makes sense. You can’t dance a dance meant for two people with only one person. (Yes, I am brilliant.) Which leads me to my next question, which is actually part 2 of my hypothesis about nudity: Does it take two to be nude? Alright,…

  • nudity, part one

    Have you ever had that nightmare—you know, the one in which you are standing in your underwear or completely naked in front of your classroom, school bus, auditorium, coworkers, the subway, walking on a crowded busy street, or [insert any large group of people in a very public situation]? Remember that feeling of standing uncovered…

  • STEU

    originally #2 was going to be about nudity, but in the middle of working on that, HS got me musing on the appropriateness of the phrase, “shut the eff up,” which we will affectionately from this point forward refer to as STEU. so, during which moments in our lives–or in what conditions and situations of…

  • Trust

    when we don’t trust, we get just plain weird. and do weird things. by this i mean– I. i don’t trust you to accept me as i am, so i overextend myself to live up to what i perceive are your expectations and definitions of “awesome.” II. i don’t trust you to tell me the…